I received a forwarded mail sometime back and i decided to send it to WorldcupGal and this was her reply to my forwarded mail to her:Original Mail
Extremely important advice and recommendations to be passed on to wives,girlfriends, fiancs, mothers, sisters, daughters, etc. (to all women in general)
These rules are to be communicated prior to the World Cup in June/July this year... FAILURE TO ADHERE TO THE RULES STIPULATED AS PER BELOW WILL RESULT IN SEVERE REPERCUSSIONS
List Of Rules.
1. From 9 June to 9 July 2006
, you should read the sports section of the newspaper so that you are aware of what is going on regarding the World Cup, and that way you will be able to join in the conversations. If you fail to do this, then you will be looked at in a bad way, or you will be totally ignored. DO NOT
complain about not receiving any attention.
2. During the World Cup, the television is mine, at all times, without any exceptions. If you even take a glimpse of the remote control, you will lose it (your eye)
3. If you have to pass by in front of the TV
during a game, I don't mind, as long as you do it crawling on the floor and without distracting me. If you decide to stand nude in front of the TV
, make sure you put clothes on right after because if you catch a cold, I wont have time to take you to the doctor or look after you during the World Cup month.
4. During the games I will be blind, deaf and mute, unless I require a refill of my drink or something to eat
. You are out of your mind if you expect me to listen to you, open the door, answer the telephone, or pick up the baby that just fell from the second floor....it wont happen.
5. It would be a good idea for you to keep at least 2 six packs in the fridge at all times, as well as plenty of things to nibble on, and please do not make any funny faces to my friends when they come over to watch the games. In return, you will be allowed to use the TV
when I'm asleep. This rule however is discretionary. (please refer to rule 2)
6. Please, please, please!! if you see me upset because one of my teams is losing, DO NOT
say "get over it, its only a game"
, or "don't worry, they'll win next time"
. If you say these things, you will only make me angrier and I will love you less
. Remember, you will never ever know more about football than me and your so called "words of encouragement" will only lead to a break up or divorce (not necessarily in that order)
7. You are welcome to sit with me to watch one game and you can talk to me during halftime but only when the commercials are on, and only if the halftime score is pleasing me. In addition, please note I am saying "one"
game, hence do not use the World Cup as a nice cheesy excuse to "spend time together"
8. The replays of the goals are very important. I don't care if I have seen them or I haven't seen them, I want to see them again. Many times
9. Tell your friends NOT to have any babies, or any other child related parties or gatherings that requires my attendance because:
a) I will not go
b) I will not go
c) I will not go
10. But, if a friend of mine invites us to his house on a Sunday to watch a game, we will be there in a flash.
11. The daily World Cup highlights show on TV every night is just as > important as the games themselves. Do not even think about saying "but you have already seen this...why don't you change the channel to something we can all watch??", the reply will be: "Refer to Rule #2 of this list"
12. And finally, please save your expressions such as "Thank God the World Cup is only every 4 years"
. I am immune to these words, because after this comes the Champions League, Italian League, Spanish League, Premier League, etc etc.
Thank you for your cooperation.
Men of the WorldHer replyI slap you!
If you want me to listen to you from 9th June to 9th July..You better behave yourself from today onwards till 9th June.. If not,I'll make your life a living hell... WAH HAHAHAHA...
My demands include:-
1) Drive me to anywhere that I want to go WITHOUT
asking for any reasons and if needed, you have to sacrifice your football/futsal session, even the one's on SUNDAYs
2) You can have your own private time from 8am to 5pm(working hours)
, other than that, it all belongs to me, and I have the RIGHT to instruct you to do anything
, which includes bring me to supper at anytime. WAHAHAHAHA...
3) From today onwards till 9th June, everything in your room will be under my name, which means if you NEED
to use anything, that includes the PC,your hp, your downstairs TV
, you got to get permission from me.
4) So what else, try to be my darling and then you will enjoy your worldcup... Or else, you won't have a worldcup.
5) Buy me anything I want, it can be a bottle of Belgium Chocolate, a cup of ice cream and etc etc (Don't forget I'm a creative person and I'll never run out of ideas, double WA AHAHHAHAHAHAH)
Thanks for your cooperation as well.